Do I want chess to become mainstream? Do I want it to pick
up corporate sponsors so the elite grandmasters are forced to play in Tide
jackets or Nike ball caps and do commercials about teeth whitening products?
Not in a zillion years. But boy, oh boy, I would really like there to be more
players and fans.
Football. Hey, it’s an iconic American activity like
baseball or eating too much or faking like you think politically correct things
all the time. I get it, I really do, but I’ve never been a real sports fan.
While I can appreciate someone who can hit umpteen homeruns in a row, a man who
makes the touchdown of the century, or a heavyweight boxer who has literally
knocked out every opponent who has ever faced him, it’s just not what floats my
boat. Not entirely.
To each his own and trust me, those aren’t just words coming
from me. I truly believe in them. If you wish to spend your Sundays eating and
drinking too much and watching cars go round and round for five hundred miles
or seeing unreasonably large and aggressive men sweat on a field, by all means,
that’s yo thang. I don’t say much about it, because I can appreciate that
people appreciate things that other than the things I do. I hope that makes
sense.
But so why, then, is it okay for everyone to knock chess so
easily? When I tell folks I’d rather play or watch chess than turn on the NFL,
I’m sure you can imagine the looks and comments I get. I’m assuming because
sports are very mainstream and chess is not, I’m seen as somewhat of a freak
for choosing one over the other, and that’s okay; I probably am a freak. But
I’m a freak who likes chess and keeps his mouth shut when it comes to other
people’s passions. I wish more would do the same or, at the very least, give
chess a try. It makes me wonder how many potential masters spend their spare
time eating Cheetos and yelling at the television because some athlete screwed
up a play.
For me personally, watching sports is just too passive an
activity. I suppose it would be different if the fans of sports were also
athletes themselves. It’s one thing to watch the big game and then go play it
on a field, but quite another to fall into a drunken sleep, fingers orange and
salty, belly protruding, mouth wide open. ‘merika.
And that, friends, is where chess and sports really differ.
I can spend a few hours watching a top-tier match between two famous
grandmasters and then actually compete in the game myself. No, not at
the GM level, but that isn’t to say I couldn’t if I had the time and resources.
But very few NFL fans are going to be drafted this next season, straight from
the couch. That’s all I’m saying.
In our society, it is far, far more acceptable to be
entertained by three-hundred-pound men hurling themselves at each other over a
ball that isn’t even round than to enjoy an afternoon playing a quiet game of
chess with a friend. I’m no psychologist, so I’m not sure what that indicates,
but my best guess is that it probably isn’t great.
Don’t get me wrong, here, I’m not saying society would
improve if everyone played chess, I’m not saying people would be better if they
enjoyed the gentelman’s game, and I’m not saying sports are bad in any way,
shape, or form. What I am saying, though, is that if more people had open
minds, they’d surely receive more out of life.
Sucks to be them. My mind has been doorless since I was
born. Bring it on, I say. I have watched sports, I know most of the rules to
all of the games, and I even enjoy them time to time. But to be burned at the
stake for choosing rook sacrifices over double plays is just backward-ass
thinking.
Now, go checkmate someone. Or don’t.
